KL pool party ruined after man tried to use boobs as flotation devices

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A local man accused of “groping the breasts of multiple women” at a recent pool party has walked free after his lawyer raised a convincing argument at a preliminary hearing. The accused, a 34-year old from Petaling Jaya, was immediately released after his lawyer made a startling revelation.

The man’s story was that he’d been invited to a party at a condominium in Bukit Damansara by a group of friends, and he had only intended to relax on a deck chair beside the pool while his friends went for a swim. According to the accused, he asked a passer-by to fetch him a glass of cold lime juice, as he was feeling hot & thirsty after spending some time in the sun. Instead, the stranger returned with a glass of lime juice that had been generously spiked with vodka. While he admitted the drink ‘didn’t taste as he had expected’, he said he found it enjoyable enough and proceeded to finish the beverage. A short time later, the accused decided a trip to the restroom was required, but in his intoxicated state he accidentally fell into the swimming pool.

Over the next five minutes, the accused allegedly groped the breasts of numerous women, which he explained simply as “trying to find a flotation device to avoid drowning”. He was hauled from the pool by an angry lifeguard and was nearly beaten to a pulp before his friends intervened. The party’s organizers made a formal complaint and the accused was ordered to explain the indecent assault. Appearing at the hearing wearing dark sunglasses, the accused made a surprising admission “I’m completely blind!”

Following this admission, there was no way any charges would stick, so the man was released immediately. Onlookers observed the accused leave the hearing through a side door and proceed to a nearby parking lot. “I was surprised to see him hop onto a motorbike and speed away,” commented one witness. “For a blind man, he’s quite a good driver.”

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